A CRUSHING BLOW!

THIS hurts man,  it hurts bad, I wanted to go to college so bad! I was so happy to be back in school doing something productive and learning again.  I went to register today and after going through orientation I was told that I couldn't register because I didn't have my transcript from high school, well that was agonizing because I thought the transcript had made it here already. had to go back to admissions where lo and behold my transcripts had just came in today WOW!  hot dog i'm in school now! so I register and get my classes, get the schedule and everthing (I had a 5pm friday class) maybe that was a sign, but I had all of my classes, fully registerd when I decided to go by the financial aid office just to make sure, all of my counselers told me not to stand in line because I was set and ready to go" eddie all you have to do is come to class april 6th" but something told me i'd better check just to make sure (I think it must have been the devil) I didn't want any problems in april. so after standing in the finanical aid line for over an hour I finally get in,  the lady calls my name "mr matheney you have a big problem" we show that you"re a out-of -state student  WHAT! no one mention that while I was going through this whole process?  "I'M SORRY"  you have to have lived in georgia for a year to be considerd in-state and since you are not in state you're not elgible for the hope grant and the tuition fees for out-of -state students TRIPLES so the pell grant want cover it, you got 1,200 dollars?? BAM! it hit me like a ton of bricks i'm not gonna be in school! I lose again! just as i'm about to succed.  it happened in shreveport I had trained for my class A license and the lady was about to give me my license when she discovered that california had a block on my license for non-payment of child-support.  well how can I pay child support when I can't work?   no school no job no nothing! might as well go get loaded! might as well, I have nothing to live for!  NAW i'm not gonna do that but thats the wayI feel.  gonna go to a meeting tonight. I don't know why but after this happend I got so hungry! maybe I didn't need to be going to school anyway, homeless ass niggah trying to go da school? with my old ass, where was I gonna study ?what about books? and food? my contract with the samaritan house runs out the 25th of april. so maybe it was the best thing.  it still hurts.